Day 4 and I am better

So after the breakdown yesterday I really sat down and thought about what I was doing and thought about why this would bother me. Well I have decided that it is because I am trying to control my emotional eating and my emotions don't like that. I have never really had many other places to vent myself after the kids came along and I lost the time and space to do my artwork or many other things I use to do all the time. I miss dancing every weekend and feeling like a person rather than a "Mom" all the time. Not that I don't like being a Mom, I Love It, I just don't feel like some of myself survived the transition. I guess that is really what I am angry about.... not angry, Sad. I am not giving my family all I have to give because I lost some it. That is what I fighting to get back, me so that my family can have all of me. So today was a lot better day because I kept that in mind. It felt good to have tacos with the kids but to not go over board. It even felt good to reach for something else than the bag of chocolate sitting next to me when Things went bad tonight with the kids. I know I will get through this although I am sure I am going to have many more days like yesterday and I will have to start all over again. But for today I will enjoy my small triumph of this being the first day I didn't go over my point and have to use my extra... YAH ME!!!